and now the end (of 20.109) is near...


Coming up with a research article that both I and my lab partner found interesting was a mission (Miami slang for "exasperation especially referring to matters of time"). I, having decided that being an Ob-Gyn is my ultimate career goal, cared to identify only research related to female reproductive health. My lab partner, who has aspirations outside of clinical work, had many more up-and-coming proposals and we tried to meet each other halfway. We spent many hours on zoom. We read more papers than I ever thought I could read. We were frequently heartbroken to find our research idea had already been taken, by some man in the 1980s. She shared this meme with me which perfectly expressed our emotions. We felt we knew nothing. It was hard to settle down but we did after we decided to stop reading literature because the well was too deep and we were never going to reach the bottom. I guess people dedicate their whole PhDs to studying the field and we spent two weeks.




 🎶Frank Sinatra's "My Way" is circling my thoughts.

 "Yes, there were times, I'm sure you knew
When I bit off more than I could chewBut through it all, when there was doubtI ate it up and spit it outI faced it all and I stood tallAnd did it my way"

I cannot believe this semester is coming to a close. It feels like we've lived through eternity together. On one hand, I can look forward to "free time" which I will actually, hopefully, dedicate to those skills and hobbies I was hoping to get to over quarantine. On the other, I am not sure how to structure my life without school. I won't have interactions with lab partners, instructors, and classmates facilitated by our uniting responsibilities. Even if we struggled through it, I can say having 20.109 through this quarantine added to my sense of belonging. 

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